Frankenmommy passed away on Thursday morning around 4:30 in the morning. Since then, it’s been a natural disaster that won’t quit. Until Saturday night, I hadn’t slept since Tuesday. I was put in charge of funeral arrangements and have had to mediate fights between my father and Blacksheep and my youngest sister and Blacksheep.
Nothing about my mother dying feels real yet. I don’t believe it, and don’t think I will until I see her beautiful face resting in her coffin. I have dreaded many things, but this morning I shook as I gathered my toiletries to shower. Today will suck. And that is fact.
I have to say, despite having to go through this awful experience of falling on hard concrete, my family, especially Husband and my friends, have created this giant fluffy pillow to help me land softly. I feel completely embraced in love and good thoughts and for this I am truly grateful.
I hope that today that pillow catches my inevitable free fall into my mother’s death which currently seems like a horrid dream but is sadly my new reality.