Month: October 2011

False Alarm, Fire Alarm, Fudge

Today a student pulled the fire alarm sending shockwaves through the school. Since this occurred early in the day, the whole day has been a clusterf*ck-waste-of-time. The alarm keeps going off because they can’t reset it right. What a day.

So, as the principal got on the PA for the third time today gloating at having caught the culpret, I thought, “I too would like to pull the fire alarm.” I would then like to be a stowaway on one of the fire trucks that will inevitably arrive. They can take me away from this school where nothing gets done because there are too many interruptions and distractions.

Those red fire alarm pulls are so tempting. Seriously. Even the ink that comes pouring out of them, it’s all so sexy. Think about it. That kid, whoever he, sitting in jail or juvey, whichever, he’s going down as “the kid who pulled the fire alarm.”

Pulling the fire alarm in high school makes you a celebrity. He’ll return for his ten year reunion, there will be nostalgic jokes about the principal saying, “we caught the dummy.” Even I thought it was funny.

Still, I wonder if there is a deeper reason as to why this student pulled the fire alarm. It’s possible this child is simply a jackass, but it’s also possible they needed to create a distraction. Sometimes a distraction is necessary.

It makes me think about the story I’ve been working on. The story needs something with a pizzazz, like a fire alarm, arrest, and a joke.

Today’s been one of those days that I can’t figure it out.

We’re about halfway through the day, and I can’t tell which way it’s turning out. The M&Ms I’m about to enjoy are definitely making it better. Also, the 8 miles in my new Nikes is going to make it better. The one thing that’s been distracting me from being super teacher is the ueber amounts of excitement I have to be marrying FH in December. I seriously can’t contain myself. It’s the only thing I think about.

Ramblings

I should totally be putting grades into the gradebook, but instead I’m here.

This semester feels like the longest game of catch up. I just can’t get it together. And to make things worse, today, for the first time ever, I lost student work. I have never done that. I was running scantrons, which I put into a folder, went back to my classroom, got to my classroom with all the copies I made while I was grading the scantrons, but no scantrons. What the hell?

I’m about to lose it. I have emptied my file cabinent, gone back to the room where I graded the scantrons. Nothing. I don’t think my students will really notice or care, it’s just so effing lame and unprofessional.

This morning I totally woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Last night there was some wedding drama. FH talked me off the ledge last night, but when I woke up I felt terrible and guilty even though the reason all the drama went down was not my fault.

I have been debating if I want to write a post about this. I’m totally having a Virgina Woolf moment where I wish I was totally independent so I could write about whatever the hell I want. I don’t want to write about it only to upset FH.

FH, if you read this, will you let me know if you’re cool with my writing about what happened last night?

This post has absolutely no direction. I have been wicked focused in the mornings this past week, but by afternoon it’s gone. I want to stay at work until all my grading is done, but my homework is due in the class I’m taking, I’m making burgers tonight, and frankly I’m sick of being at this desk doing work.

While I was making copies and losing student work, a colleague came into the planning room and we were talking.

“I just can’t seem to get caught up.”
“Well, there is a teacher workday coming up, you can get caught up then.”

What are the chances the entire day is taken up by mother-effing meetings?

Sometimes I feel like I work at Dunder-Mifflin and I do everything but my job–which I have to remind myself is to teach.

The wedding is coming up and my parents are coming up for a visit next week. I can’t wait. I miss them so freakin’ much. FH is so lucky to have his family close by.

I’m back…well sort of

I know, I know. I’m a terrible person. I haven’t written in ages. Shame on me.

I have been writing fiction for the first time in months and with all the other stuff going on (wedding, half marathon training, hunting for a new place for FH and I to live, and oh yeah– a full time effing job) I’ve been a bit preoccupied.

Teaching high school has been a big fat reminder that I’m a tenure track professor at heart. I’ve been so busy with lesson plans, meetings, and more meetings that I hardly have time to get anything done. I’m also very involved; I am a co-sponsor of the Creative Writing Club. And by co-sponsor I mean that I run and organize it all and the three other teachers get credit, none of whom actually attend any of the meetings. Still, I don’t really care because I’m basically running a workshop, which is what I love about being an MFA. I’m also band staff six hours a week after school.

I have never in my whole existence been this busy. Every minute seems to be taken up with something. I took my first ever mental health day on Monday. It was lovely. I went to Bikram Yoga for the first time (almost passed out), got some wedding stuff done (yay, we have limos and hotel rooms to stay in before the wedding) and felt refreshed on Tuesday.

As of late, the wedding hasn’t been stressing me out, my seriously lacking pay check, however, has. I am still being paid as a substitute (a whopping 70 bucks a day folks), and I’m busting my ass. I really have to order my garters, shoes, and under garments for the wedding but can’t. I did pass the required state exam (very stoked–it cost two hundred bucks and apparently no one passes the first time!) so I’ll finally be making teacher pay in November–hopefully sooner than that.

My dietician made an observation in our last meeting. She said, “One Mean MFA, your life seems to be coming together. You’re job, your getting married, you’re in the best shape of your life….” Of course, today this all came to a crashing halt. The principal of my school announced to the faculty that he was taking some baller position at the district and that the job starts in November. I wanted to cry. He was one of the best leaders I’ve ever had the pleasure to work for. He went out of his way to hire me. He could have easily hired a licensed teacher. Then when I didn’t have any technology in my room, he lent me his personal laptop for my classroom. He even came down to my classroom the day before my test to wish me good luck. The students love him, the staff loves him. He’s just one of the greats. I’m blaming my dietician for this one. Everything was going smoothly and then Buh-Lam.

Not that the principal leaving to better his career is this big awful thing, but I am being selfish and nervous that this will impact my job next year. While I don’t want to teach high school forever, there is something very nice about stability. I haven’t had it since like my sophomore year of high school, so yeah. I’ll take some stability right now. When spring rolls around, I won’t be so busy. I think I’m going to be inspired by Wide Lawns and her progress and bang out my memoir. She mentioned how she just had to get the book out of her system, and I get exactly what she means. It’s like it’s taking up space in my damn brain. Really lots of thoughts are.